I knew the entire time that he was only coming to leave me again… I promised myself I would be brave this time and not let tears overwhelm me and most of all, not let that silly pansy side of me overpower my rational side. I tried to make small talk as it came closer to him leaving and then as usual, I said it… “Don’t go…” , knowing only too well that he had to go because if he didn’t go, then he’d never come back. He laughed and said… “Don’t start, again…” That was it and the water gate burst open and down came the tears… Why I did this to myself every time, I will never know but there I was, crying in a public place, with happy people all around me. Oh boy, did I hate myself for embarrassing myself and him at that moment…
He mellowed down, took my hand in his and said in a way only he could say it and NOT piss me off, “Such a drama queen, you are!” I wanted to punch him and kiss him all at the same time. He wiped my tears like you see in the movies and then he walked me to a place where I could catch a rickshaw to the bus stop. I got onto the cycle rickshaw even though I absolutely hate the idea of having a man cycle me around; I just wanted to be away from him so that I could let the tear drops fall. He hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. The worst was over, or so I thought. It’s a rainy day in Jaipur and I always remember rainy days in Jaipur from nearly 3 years ago, with his Maruti 800, driving to Nahargadh and on Ashu’s Yamaha getting soaked to the bone as we just had to get out for pani puri. As the rickshaw walah pedals away slowly, I do the inevitable… the turning around and staring at him walking away part… and yes, now… I’m in hysterics… crying like a little school girl and yes, this is when I imagined the song playing… our song… as we bade that inevitable goodbye…
‘Cause it’s you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it’s you and me and all other people
And I don’t know why, I can’t keep my eyes off of you…’
I’m a sappy little goose and even after 3 years, I cry each time he leaves and each time I leave; this is why I say LONG DISTANCE relationships are a bitch!!